My father, though never the most footloose and fancy-free of souls, was always relatively healthy. As is with most families, my brothers and I placed silent odds among ourselves over which parent would leave this world first. That’s why, when the cancer diagnosis came in, it surprised everyone- especially him.
Up to his diagnosis, I’d been using my mala as a means of gathering wealth. I focused on my business and growing my clientele. My mantra, “I am tapped into an infinite supply of abundance,” was exactly that: a mantra to attract as much money to me and my wife as possible. However, once the news from the doctors came in, my mind rightly couldn’t stop thinking about my father and his situation far, far away in another state.
And then one morning while doing my routine it came into my mind: he’s going to pass away soon. Very soon.
Meanwhile, back in Kentucky where they lived, miles away from my new home in Texas, Doctors and clinicians assured my mother and father that there were options and tests to be run and interpreted. People were hopeful. Yet every morning and night I meditated on my mala mantra, the notion that his time was limited solidified more and more into an assurance. I had to get home. Now.
Fast forward one week later and I’m on a plane racing back home. He’d unexpectedly slipped into a coma hours after I instinctively bought a plane ticket home. His tests came back while I switched planes in Atlanta- inoperable. By the time I arrived home and pulled up to the hospital, it was time to give my father last rites. As we stood around him in the hospital room, each whispering our goodbyes, I held his hand. Moments later I just knew; he was gone.
I’d been in the hospital room only twenty minutes and he waited until I arrived before letting go and passing on. We were so blessed to be able to all be there for it, together.
Over the next week, one question that kept coming up was: how did you know? I didn’t know how to answer that at first until one morning while saying my intentions, it hit me: I didn’t. I just listened to whatever did.